The Ragwitch - Mood Swings

I think one of the problems in this book is that the author is throwing around a lot of tones and moods without smooth transitions between them. He opens the next chapter, and Paul is freaking out about how cool it is to be guided by a thousand squawking birds in the hot air balloomn, and on the next page BAM suddenly the birds are gone and it's ultra-quiet and it's just wierd. And that joyful bird moment came out of nowhere. And it's just not convincing. Paul's supposed to be trying to save his mortally endangered sister, not to mention the entirety of this rotten hole in this universe.

I think there's also some suffering here from Adventure Anxiety, where the author is scared that they're not making their story sound enough like an adventure, so they throw in moments where the characters are having an exccessively awesome time, particularly if it has to do with nature (cue birds). Also, Paul says something on 137 about how much he's learnt about birds in the last hour, and it's like, come on Nix, stop it--the fantasy realm as a place where the MC grows and learns a lot and has fun beign on an adventure? It's been done; it doesn't surprise us. You need to rely on execution for this one, becuase it's not an original device. My advice--get subtle. Fast.

The Ragwitch - Wha's This? A Twist?!

A twist! I am so proud. And for the first time, really excited! So here's what Julia did for the Ragwitch--anyone who attacks the ragwitch also hurts Julia.

DAMNIT.

Good show, Nix. Keep it up. That's what I like.

Oh, and then in the middle of the scene these other people crop up out of nowhere and we swtich to their POV. They're I guess townspeople trying to stop the evil or something. Some sort of resistence. And apparently they're "waiting" for Paul to show up. Ooh, big deal. The Master of Air better be here or I will be UPset.

The Ragwitch - Stall di StallityStall

Stall. We're doing it. Q and Paul bro out on their balloon and they get to a frozen waterfall and Paul asks if the Master of Air will come there and Q's like "Maybe" and Paul's like "Wow, I'm starting to believe this here companion I've acquired doesn't know squat" and then Q's like "I don't expect him to be here, but I expect our GUIDE to be here," like whoop de doo why did you waste our time like that. Stop with the cute, get with the plot. Why must we saunter like this? Paul should have enough motivation that he's not distracted by Q's story about TREASURE around the waterfall. Hello? Paul. Babe. No.

Anyway, that happens. I'm really getting mad at this author's use of the word "obviously." As in

"It flew slowly, and circled back several times--obviously waiting to guide them" (129).

If it's OBVIOUS you don't need to SAY ANYTHING. If you don't think we'll get it, you can just at a nice parenthetical "--waiting to guide them." Having both is quadruple overkill. CLEARLY THIS BIRD MEANS TO DO SOME GUIDING.

Also, the Ragwitch tells Julia she's been serving her well. Julia and I are nervous about this ominous statement.

The Ragwitch - Bro Time

Julia and Lyssa the old lady bro out around the fire where Julia is able to stay for short periods of time and the Ragwitch can't sense her there. Suddenly, something is trasnpiring out in the Ragwitch's world, so Lyssa sends Julai to touch the ever-present glwong orb, which will send Julia back to the Ragwitwch's consciousness.

Back at the ranch, Quigin and Zeppo are also broing out. Hey! Hey! Actually creative idea! The balloon is moved by soem sort of creature. That's wicked fucking cool! They'll get to their destination by midnight. And then some sort of sudden draft blsuters them around a bit.

The Ragwitch - Prison Buds

Another page with Paul and we've concluded once again that yes, Quigin know the fricking way to the Master of air, "Or at least, he said he did" (114); which I'm not sure whether to call a stab at humor or a bad bad stab at foreshadowing. That is some bulky, awkward foreshadowing you got going on there.

Anyway. Julia.

Julia has a friend! The old lady the Ragwitch defeated is now inside with Julia, too! In the refuge they havein the recesses of the Ragwitch's mind, they sit around a campfire. Teh old lady sasy somethigns about she's more and less than what she seems, and if the ragwitch knew what she was the lady would be easily slain. Not very explanatory, but I'm hoping they'll get to it.

The Ragwitch - FINALLY. PLOT.

MAYBE. HERE'S HOPING.

Quigin is great...ish. He's kind of a tropey sack of predictability, but then he earns a thousand points in my book because he does better than anyone else yet in the one thing I'm crrently interested in--MOVIGN TOWARD PLOT. We have all this talk about how Q's master told him to take anyone he met named Paul anywhere he liked.

And instead of JUMPING ON THAT and saying "Take me to the fucking Master of Wind," Paul is all like, "Well, can I meet your boss? He sounds of cool" and Q's all like "Well, he's disappeared for a while, he does that occasionally, sorry" and then finally Paul explains every little detail of what's happened adn about the Ragwitch and all Q's interested in are liek how many points are on Ornware's antlers, etc, and finally he's like, "Let's go," and Paul's like "Where?" and Q's like, "To the Master of Wind, of course. Isn't that where you wanted?"

And Paul's DUMBFOUNDED.

Paul! Stop beign dumbfounded and go do your heroic duty! Now! On the double!

Yeesh. At least Q seems to have some sense.

The Ragwitch - Stalling? Never!

I'm beginning to suspect that every single Paul scene is just there to stall before the end of the book. Becuase clearly the Ragwitchis the source of conflict, and it's clear that eventually Paul is gonna get there and have to deal with her to save Julia, so clearly all these beefy pages are mostly there to prolong the time until Paul gets to Julia.

Case in point--Paul is finally on the road, headed towards the plot when out of the blue this guy in a hot air balloon starts yelling at him about a hare. Eventually lands, and turns out he's another secondary character here to steal the show so Paul doesn't fail worse. And despite the grumpy, disorganized head-in-the-clouds-endearing aeronaut trope beign heavy-handedly waved about, I still like Quigin a great deal more than Paul. Welcome to the team, Q.

But it's clear that those two seconds of actual plot are gone until next time. Sigh.

Anyway, Q is interesting, he's a "friend of beasts" and he's looking for his hare who lef the balloon to have lunch and this other guy has ltos of animals, etc. etc. and I'm excited to learn more. My onyl big beef with Q is that he's dangerously close to beinga total Lee Scoresby rip-off, and no one messes wit Lee Scoresby, because Lee Scoresby is perfect. So watch out, Q.

The Ragwitch - Huh! Surviving Magic!

Magic that survives! The unburned house ahs three runes on it, and theree's a n old lady inside callign the names out. She knows some magic. Unfortunately, only three out of the four necessary for protection. But that's cool--it means there's magic ot lear out there. This is a great way to introduce us to these ideas. Well done, Nix. Very neat.

Also we have another construction going on: Oroch messed up in not relaizing someone would know magic or something, so that's a strike against him, and the Ragwitch gives him two more chances and then she's gonna pull off his bandages to see what they're hiding about what he looks like. Fantastic! Can't wait! Very neat.

And then we get back to Paul and Paul's boring. He's climbing down the mountain. Oh well, Paul. We'll catch you tomorrow.

The Ragwitch - Scary Doll

Good haul, on this fine evening. Concluding Paul's scene, Tanboule tells him to leave directly to begin seeking the elemental people, without going back to the cabin to say bye to Aleyne. Sad, sad. A little clumsy. But I'm actually glad we don't have to go through with that. Just right to the action. Can't wait.

Meanwhile, Julia's hell gets worse and worse. I am so afriad of this frigging doll. Very nice, shudder-worthy details, like how her worm-like tongue moves in her dry cloth mouth (Guuh!).

Ragwitch and monster minions are attacking towns and basically, it seems, doing what they were doing during her first takeover--killing everything. Pillaging, burning. No life. None. Ragwitch is a total bitch to Julia, making her watch as all the villagers are killed.

Surprisingly, there were a couple of boring parts in this section. I didn't feel like reading them. I found myself scanning and crossed out. But! Right at the end, something intriguing--there seems to be a house among the wreckage that was totally unburned. Hmm...

The Ragwitch - Woohoo! Quest!

Well, we had a vaguefest again and Paul is still Paul BUT NOW WE HAVE A REAL QUEST AND I AM SO EXCITED!!!

Page 91 - Tanboule goes into a trance and speaks in a weird voice, saying: "You must seek the Wild Magic that cast the Ragwitch away. Search out Earth, Air, Fire and Water and bind them to your aid! For the Magi are dead and the way to the Patchwork King long forgotten. Only the ancient powers of the Beginning can help you now!"

All RIGHT! Plot in SIGHT! I'm on BOARD! Also these elements are apparently manifest in: "The Master of Air and the Earth Lady...And the Fire Queen and Water Lord" (94).

PSYYYYYCHED.

A few quotes from Paul, just to satisfy my rage, and I'll just let them speak for themselves:

"...Everything was suddenly becoming very complicated...it was getting worse than math homework, or writing a report on some stupid play" (90)

"Paul fought a sudden temptation to ask him how he could get back home--alone, without Julia" (91)

(Geez, Paul)

"If Tanboule was so wise he ought to know that Paul didn't like having to work out things for himself" (94)

Onward! to the quest! In the name of improving Paul and saving Julia! Woohoo!

The Ragwitch - Backstory

Aha, so now we finally know the backstory of the Ragwitch. Now having read the whole chapter, I think it's pretty good and fits great with what we already know, but at the time I was pretty annoyed at how super vague everything was. Here's the basic story (don't worry, there aren't many details to miss): This king (called the Patchwork King, I love it) outlawed using magic. Then they had a healer Witch in the army, and she was like, well, can I use more magic to help us win? And he was like Sure, and so she learned lots of magic and raised the rock creatures from the deep and "opened one forgotten door too many" and "danced the steps of Seven Awakenings" (84) (don't you want to know?? I really want to know!! It's frustrating!!) and then got really evil, and boom, ragwitch. Well, first queen of the north. And she took over everything and start killing every living thing in the land. The few Magi that exist but still aren't allowed to do magic finally wise up and start doign magic, but it's not powerful enough and they almsot die out and then suddenly Ornware the antler head awesome guy and the Nature Magic comes to help, and the witch is cast into our world as a doll that can't die. And the crow is set to watch her.

Which kind of disappointed me. Really? That freaking crow from the beginning was supposed to be guarding the most evil powerful entity of all time and Little Julia and Little Paul so easily ran up there, took the doll, and brought it home? I am so unimpressed. What a plothole. There is kind of no excusing this. WHY WERE THESE PUNY KIDS ABLE TO BREAK THROUGH THAT CROWS DEFENCES LIKE TAKING CANDY OFF THE STREET. I remain upset about this.

Anyway, I did like a lot the image of the Magi who were hiding in this place with this stone circle and this ring of rowan trees even older than the rocks themselves, and they're still there, and I'm really hoping that setting will come back in the climax.

The Ragwitch - Cabbages

Cabbages! I LOVED this scene. Paul has to plant cabbages all frigging day and then finally he's like "Heck with this, I've done at least 80 by now" and the old guy's like "Yep, a hundred and thirty two, hee hee!" It was the best. I love love love this guy.

So since Paul did more, he gets advice but also supper. Bacon, cabbages, bread, and tea. Sounds good to me. They go walking, but old guy gets ahead and Paul loses sight, keeps going, finds a nice valley where the house is, and this is the coolest house ever because it's full of ladders and platforms and it's decked out with ship paraphernalia inside. It's great. I am such a fan. Not of Paul, of course, but I don't expect that to change for a little bit. Oh well! Show-stealing side characters! Works for me!

The Ragwitch - Our Friend Paul

Paul. Bro.

This line, from Paul's thoughts: "Trust Julia to get kidnapped to a place without buses,"

("he thought sourly," 67)

Buddy. You need to get some character development pronto, or I'll just hate you forever.

They're at the inn, whatever, and basically it's a crazy stag party for three days. Really, they just party for three days. They give Pual beer. Really, guys?

Then finally the innkeeper's like, Paul, you should totally go climb up the mountain alone now and go find the Wise. I can't tell you why or how I know.

So over the hills he goes, whining all the way wah wah wah about how he hates climbing,

and finally we get to the wise! I like this guy a lot. Basically Paul finds this old guy planting cabbages. Paul thinks this is super unexpected, but meanwhile I'm thinking, "Wow. Gardening as metaphor for life. Gardener. Growing things. God images. Nope, all this sounds about right." So I guess Paul just isn't aware of the stereotype.

The old guy says the kind of advice Paul needs is worth 80 planted cabbages, so Paul has to plant those. I really, really like this guy, and not just because he puts Paul in his place. (There's a great line where Paul is like, I never even let my Dad make me weed in the garden before, and I'm just like, Paul you little wimp, get on the ground and save your frigging sister.)

The Ragwitch - What People Are Up To

Well, at least Paul and Aleyne have found the inn by the end of the chapter, at the foot of the mountain in the place called Rhysamarn. Good show! Paul still whines, though.

I love the relationship between Julia and the Ragwitch. Everything with these characters is very interesting. But there's some talk of "Julia goes back to a place of more Julia-ness insdie the Ragwitch's body, near a glowing orb, etc etc" thing, while the Ragwitch is "busy." I just want to know what that means. What is she busy with doing? Come on, you can't hide this stuff forever.

The Ragwitch - Paauuuuuul

Paul! You need to stop!

Paul is being really blatantly whiny. I think Nix is going for a "I am a brat but I become a hero and save my sister" kind of plot, but I don't like how it's set up. Paul was a little whiny in the woods, but while indeed irritating that was totally understandable--it's the MC being dropped into a new universe. He's supposed to be cranky for a few minutes. But then we had a chapter or two where he was okay, and now we're officially On the Adventure and suddeny he's Mr. Whiney Pants, and it's SO BLATANT. Some examples: "Paul looked gloomily around the campsite. He hated camping" (55); "Good greasy wool will keep the weather out.' 'Oh,' said Paul, who hated the feel of wool, and didn't like the sound of 'greasy' wool."; "[Paul] knew this forest would be as bad as the other one" (57).

Yeah, that harrowing wood where we were kidnapped by Maydancers. You ain't seen nothing yet, Paul. You don't know what Julia's going through. I definitely like Julia a lot more than Paul now, and I didn't expect that. If he's gonna change to hero, I'd like it to be sooner rather than later. Otherwise I'm never going to enjoy any scenes with Paul, unless some really stellar secondary characters dive in and save the show. Which frankly, they're already doing. There was this great Pan-like creature guy spirit of the forest named Ornware who was frigging awesome. He has antlers and yellow eyes. Though I was a little annoyed that they mentioned the yellow times about three times.

Also, we're beign chased by Garwulches or whatever the apey minions of the Ragwitch's are. Ornware killed some.

Also, Aleyne's keeping some stuff secret. A couple of really super obvious ellipsis-filled statements of his were saying so. I am Ticked Off. Better ways to foreshadow man; they're out there. Give up the ellipses. They just so rarely add anything. They just make you look like a bad script writer. If you're gonna be a bad writer, your form should at least be recognizable.

Let's go, guys. Keep it up. The plot is indeed starting to become engaging. Don't let Paul and Nix join up and ruin it.

The Ragwitch - Plot Thickening

Aha! Some improvement! I'm on page 52. Good stuff happening. A few cases of pointing out the obvious, like the Ragwitch says to Julia's trapped consciousness, Ha ha I've got all these minions making shrieking noises, and "You will like them" (43), and the next line is:

"'No,' said Julia, defiantly. She was absolutely sure that the things that made those noises would not be likeable at all."

Was that whole sentence really necessary? It could have been

"No,' said Julia, defiantly. She was sure she wouldn't.

That would have delivered the irony I think Nix was going for. But the sentence that's there instead goes on a beat or two too long, and it sounds like he thinks we don't understand that the evil evil evil doll's shrieking minions will not, in fact, be enjoyable company for Julia.

But then, we get some real good scary stuff. One of my comments on these pages was: "This is bloody fantastic. I am freaked out by this fucking doll." The visual details of her and the minions she summons are impressively original, resonant (that "whoa I had a nightmare about that long long ago it's like you're in my soul!" feeling) and tingling in their scary.

The big rocky throne the Ragwitch is sitting on is called the Spire. She calls for a specific servant called Oroch, and he bursts out of the Spire, saying he had been trapped there. They agree that the Ragwitch has gotten more powerful. Notes at the bottom of this chapter page: "I am so ready for more. What happened all that time ago? Who are "they", who trapped Oroch? I'm scared. Please, Paul, get better at being a Main Character. Julia is in some serious shit."

Back at the ranch, Paul is on a boat headed for Rhysamarn, guffawing with Aleyne the Knight about Paul's failure at pronouncing the names of things in this world. It's kind of a camp-fest. All the camp. Ho ho ho, we're on an adventure, and this bizarre world you come from with "carz" etc is so weird Paul...

but it's not too bad, and at least we're actively on the way somewhere now. I feel better now that I see I'm only an 8th through this book, so plenty of more things are bound to happen.

This is my hope. Don't let me down, Garth.

The Ragwitch - Beginning

A few days ago I started editing The Ragwitch by Garth Nix, who I almost typed as "Darth Nix" by accident.

Page 1: I'm already nervous. The first line is: "Come on, Paul!" shrieked Julia as she ran down the dune, the sand sliding away under her bare feet."

Come on Paul is fine, but why waste so many precious first-line words on Julia's bare feet and what they're doing in the sand? I might want to know about this Paul and this Julia. Maybe why there's sand. But you already told me with "dunes" that there's sand. Are you trying to be romantic and child's adventure-ish with this talk of running bare feet? My gut is saying red flag.

The first chapters are very strange and my frown got deeper and deeper. Here's the story so far: These kids find a huge midden--man-made pile of shells by the seashore--and walk around on it, and find a nest with a big black ball of feathers. Julia digs in it to see what she can find. Suddenly, a giant shrieking crow attacks, and her brother Paul fights it off. Julia notices nothing, and in the featherball find a truly evil-looking doll (I get real annoyed real fast at how many times this doll is described as "evil." Soon I will also get annoyed with how many times the doll cackles evilly.) They walk home, and clearly Julia is hypnotized by the evil doll. At home, the parents can't see the doll. Paul checks in on Julia in her room and finds her in a trance, possessed; she keeps saying the doll wants her to go somewhere. Then a witch's voice starts cackling in Paul's mind, and tries to make him march away, and so somehow he breaks from the spell in a panic, and goes to his own room to bed. Which annoyed me, because jeez Paul, your sister's possessed by an evil fricking doll. But, he's a kid. Fine. So he sleeps, and then wakes up at 6:00 in the morning, and then hears...the door close, as Julia leaves the house.

So...the doll waited all night long to take her somewhere? Until 6:00AM? When it was light again? Right when Paul wakes up? I don't buy it. This seems like a case of the author clumsily puppeteering the characters, trying to be convincing until he can find a way to get back to an action scene.

So Paul runs down to the shore after Julia. It turns out she and the doll have fused into a human-sized, repulsive, evil creature. Presumably Julia's spirit/consciousness is trapped inside. The Ragwitch uses magic to paralyze Paul, supposedly for eternity as a curse. She does some magic and disappears. Paul miraculously unfreezes and repeats the spell she just did in order to disappear.

Wakes up lost in the woods. Okay, fine. But then we go on for PAGES AND PAGES with all this "I'm lost" and "oh no my sister's been taken" you know, reviewing the plot to distract us from the useless woods-wandering scene that goes nowhere, and a few backandforths of "I must save her, it's the only thing to do" and "I'm only a meek little boy lost in a strange wood, I can do nothing, woe is me" and then finally I think he falls unconscious.

He wakes up in a hole, tied to a bed. Let me guess--captured by Wookies/other friendly forest magical creature that is totally benevolent but innocently suspicious to an extreme of human wanderers. The only point of this kind of scene is for the author to get warmed up to his own woods/quest setup he's managed to create, and distract us with a false-alarm kidnap or unconscious thing so we feel like we have to be concerned for Paul, but we don't actually.

Surprise--Maydancers. Wookies. (By the way, all the chapters from here on in have two titles--"The Maydancers/The Sea Caves"-- I guess one for Julia and one for Paul, and this bothers me. Just make it 2 chapters.)

We go to Julia's POV and just to confirm: yes, her consciousness is trapped inside the walking doll Ragwitch; yes, Ragwitch is evil; yes, still cackling.

Also, tromping around on some mountains/caves.

Back to Paul. He is freed of course, and stumbles across a nice shepherd who takes him to a town, where they talk to another shepherd. They're planning to take him somewhere mysterious and significant called "Rhysamarn". Paul falls asleep on a sheep and growls evilly, supposedly confirming for the shepherds the need to go to this Rhysamarn place.

Hm. Okay, now I'm a little more interested. Paul somewhat evil, but only when asleep? Something living inside him? Maybe that's why he's so good at resisting the Ragwitch's magic. Huh! Well done, author. Let's see how you do tomorrow.

Welcome!

Welcome to Scribble Police, where you can read daily updates on my quest for good literature in the Young Adult fantasy/fairy tale/mythical department. Every day I take a pen to at least 5 new pages of a young adult fantasy book I've never read. Then I post my thoughts here about where I think the story's going, my concerns, my excitements, etc. Let's all slow-read together.

Right now I'm working on The Ragwitch by Garth Nix, and soon I want to comment on The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making, which I read last month and LOVED. Stay tuned!

- Olivia, The Scribble Police